A Calling

[Just to let you know, I bring up a very heavy topic. It will be a bubble-burster... so if you like your bubble, you should probably skip this post. Don't get mad at me if I make you sad... you've been warned.]

Hello.

I was in a weird funk yesterday and pretty much alternated reading class material and eating snacks throughout the whole day. Part of it is because I got much less sleep over the course of the weekend than I usually do (5 hours per night as opposed to 7 or 8 hours). Even Sunday night, I slept late and had to wake up early for a midterm. I tend to eat a lot more frequently when I lose a lot of sleep… perhaps I’m just running on the quick energy I get from the food (usually SWEETS)?

The other part that contributed to my frequent eating (I think) is because I’m reading about some very very heavy topics in one of my classes… human trafficking. Here I am, talking about the blessings I have in life, having food to eat and my own bed to sleep in (in fact, I have TWO of my own beds… one at school and one at home). Then, there are young women and girls all over the world and the U.S. who are losing a sense of identity (even their names are replaced with ones like “baby doll” or whatever) as well as the control over their own bodies.

Yeah. With my fatigue and sadness over humanity, I dove head-first into a box of cereal and chocolates. I usually get in a run to deal with things like this, but yesterday was rainy in the morning and it got me in a weird mood… well, I got my hopes up by talking to my roommate (we talked for like 3 hours total… about life, faith, the world). I also get an opportunity to participate in this awesome racing event, so I felt better.

But feeling “better” doesn’t really change the situation for those people. MY feeling “better” means that I am looking away to not feel so crummy. “Better” doesn’t actually do anything in this case. This is probably why I went to the first thing I could find for comfort (again and again)… food. My relationship with food has been weirdsies in the past. These days, it’s been good. But with this topic, I just got so so down.

Finally after a huge consumption of unnecessary calories (though it’s comfort food, I felt super uncomfortable after), I prayed. I know things can’t change right away, but I just hope God can deliver these people out of oppression. I know He hears their cries and wants to rescue them. I hope they can have a voice again in this world. I pray that they can be healed from all the trauma and be whole again.

Good gravy… I’m sorry to put this all out there. I’m sure it can burst your bubble- like it did mine yesterday- but I just had to say it. If there is something you can do, DO IT. If all you can do is pray for them, then PRAY.

The little girl who is sold into sex slavery… the teenager who is beaten by the pimp for not making enough money… the young woman whose body has been battered and used by countless men… the woman who is killed and nobody cares because she was just seen as a dirty wh*re who deserved it… these are all my sisters.

My sisters don’t get to chose what they will do each day. Someone decides for them.

My sisters don’t have control over their bodies. They can be purchased for 30 to 50 dollars an hour.

My Father’s precious daughters are being mistreated and abused.

____

I couldn’t stop crying for more than an hour. I was wishing I was at home so I could ask my pastor to open the sanctuary where I could cry out in anguish and plead with God for the deliverance of His daughters.

Since I was at my apartment… with the super thin walls… I was only able to fall to my knees, sob, and pray. I guess I didn’t have to pray out loud or anything, but with so much sadness and disgust at some of the atrocities that go on in this world, I seriously wanted to just scream as loudly as possible.

So much of the feeling of turmoil was due to the fact that these sisters of mine don’t deserve any of this any more than I do. Why do I get to go after my own ambitions and dreams and they don’t? Why do I get to fall in love and they don’t? Why do I get to have a childhood while so many get abducted or sold at such a young age? How can one human put a price in dollars on the life of another human being?

I know that other Christians have struggled with these kinds of issues. I am wrestling with God right now… desperately asking Him to save these girls. In wrestling with Him, I am seeing that He was actually showing me how much HIS heart is breaking (and HAS BEEN breaking) for His daughters. 

Way before I even came across these articles for a class, His heart was already breaking for them. He was hearing their cries so much that He called out to His people. Maybe He has already called out to YOU. Don’t ignore it. If you’ve ever had a big reaction to this topic of sex work and human trafficking, don’t just feel bad for them and move on.

You may have cried for them, too… and then felt better the next day. Sorry to say, things aren’t better. Don’t ignore God’s calling. By simply being broken down by the stories/documentaries/articles, perhaps that was God calling you to help His children. These are your sisters. These are your brothers (many countries will even sell young boys).

_______

Even though I woke up feeling “better”, I will still remember His calling.

Even if I talk about the joys and blessings in my life, I will still being thinking of my sisters.

Yes, I will be going back to talking about my workouts and such, but please keep this prayer in your heart as well. This is going to be a long-term project, peoples.

_______

It’s kind of fitting that we’re studying Job through Living Life right now. Job has so many questions of WHY why why? And it talks so much about human suffering.

_______

I apologize again if I burst your Tuesday bubble.

Hope you have a blessed day.

One response to “A Calling

  1. Pingback: Get It Back « blessedwiththunderthighs·

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